Child of the African Diaspora. A journey through identity crisis, doubts, love and self-acceptance
My name is Sabrina Moella.
I am a child of the African diaspora.
I was born and raised in France. I am now living and working in Canada, but my roots and my heart are from the Congo. (DRC)
‘Child of the African diaspora.’ It took me years to come to terms with this definition. To embrace it. To understand it. Not to be ashamed or scared of it any more.
I have never been to Congo. I don’t speak its beautiful and diverse languages. I have never seen its beautiful landscapes, its wildlife, its great forests.
But my soul is Congolese nevertheless. Congolese blood runs through my veins.
It seems like an easy picture to draw now, an easy definition to write down on a piece of paper to describe myself… But this has not always been the case.
When I was a child, I wanted to be French. Badly. I was longing for the long blond hair that would dance in the wind, the pale blue eyes that would shine in the mirror, the thin lips like the ones of the actresses on TV. I was even writing letters to Santa to finally get those Caucasian features I so desperately wanted.
I was 5 and living in a world where everybody and their mothers had Caucasian features. My dolls, my teachers, the actors on TV… Everybody. So this is what I wanted for myself too. I didn’t want to be different. I wanted to blend in, to be accepted, to feel a sense of belonging…